The Amazing Race

I've always said that if I were to win the lottery of jobs, it would be to host (or even better, be camerawoman for) The Amazing Race. The host, Phil, has the best gig: travel around the world 21 times and counting. There have been times when I've thought seriously about what our video submission to be contestants would be and how we'd need to highlight a "persona" and what that would be. Not only would we get to visit over a dozen countries (potentially), but the winners of each leg of the race win a fabulous prize and the overall winning couple gets $1 million. So basically, it is an opportunity to: 1) go on a trip around the world, 2) win more trips, 3) win a car, money, etc., 4) possibly win $1 million. Sounds delicious, right?

Not so fast, my worldly friends. Think about it. It's a race. Not to be a rainy cloud of negativity, but when was the last time you went on a trip and thought to yourself... "Hmm. I wish I could visit this place as fast as I can, then leave as soon as possible"? Whenever I travel, I'm reminded of how terrible I would be on that show and how I wouldn't last more than one leg because the producers would have to come drag me away from the Japanese tea house (I envision my first stop to be Japan).

Where's the fun in traveling if you don't get to soak up everything around you? Great concept, would do it in a heartbeat, but this outlook keeps me from being too jealous every Sunday night at 8/7c.

Here are some photos from travels that prove I would be an epic failure on the show:

Can't travel and hurry at the same time

Lack of survival skills

Sub par internal compass

Inability to pack what I need to pack versus what I want to pack

Easily distracted by dogs

Pack too much

Can't drive a moped

So that's that. No need to be an unprepared, lost, weighed down, distracted American running around the world. Little 10 minute mini-trips browsing Groupon Getaways and Living Social Escapes will have to do for now. It's never too soon to start planning...